A Necessary Review

( photo: http://www.dusa.dundee.ac.uk/udasa/presidential_seal.gif )



OK, let’s review what we learned last time. Today’s subject … as usual, is politics. And after our last two abysmal performances as an electoral class, CLEARLY some homework is in order.

We’re about to embark on another campaign season. I know, I know … it already feels like this one has been going on forever, and the election is STILL almost two years away, but based on our recent history, apparently somebody needs to start banging the gong early to get our test scores up.

This isn’t about Democrats or Republicans. I’m already intentionally on record as hating both political parties, and supporting Barack Obama this campaign season. This is about America, so please remove your partisan hats for the rest of the lecture.

I COULDN’T CARE LESS WHO YOU VOTE FOR.

I know who I’m going to vote for as of this moment, and I tell you here and now that it could change any number of times between now and when I enter the voting booth at the elementary school up the street next November to play my little computer game.

Those things said, I am strongly FOR the America I’ve always read about and still believe might exist if we quit fucking up this particular test. I volunteered to serve in the military because I was an idealist, among other things, and believed then, as I do now, that the concept of America is worth defending.

But that defense doesn’t ONLY happen by picking up a rifle, aiming it, and putting a bullet center mass in some poor schmuck who was unlucky enough to meet us on the battlefield, in defense of some OTHER idea of what’s right and what’s wrong.

Sometimes, it happens by picking up a pen, or opening up a word processor, and saying some shit that needs to be said. So here we go.

We, all of us, the masses, HAVE to believe what we see this campaign cycle.

Unfortunately, the job of President doesn’t get advertised in the newspaper classifieds. There’s no formal list of requirements and qualifications. We don’t get to individually interview the prospects, there’s not much sensible recruiting happening, and we don’t have the luxury of leaving the position open until the ideal Joe comes along.

What we have is a grueling, and unfair process that lasts a looooong time to give us a chance to see how a candidate deals with adversity.

But that process actually works. For as long as I have been watching politics, which is about 25 years now, thanks to Danny B, we have ALWAYS gotten exactly what we thought we were getting.

How a man or woman deals with that process has ALWAYS given us enough information to know how they will deal with the job. The process is grueling and unfair because the JOB is grueling and unfair.

But, to its credit, the process has always given us enough information about the people in contention, for us to KNOW what we’re getting for our lever-pull.

We’re knowingly elected adulters, morons, liars, cheaters, and the corrupt. And never, not ONCE, can we honestly say we didn’t know what we were getting.

So here’s what we should be looking for this time.

1. Integrity. We’ve more than filled our quota of lies from the Oval Office. It’s time for a man or woman who does the right thing when nobody’s looking, and will be honest about what they’ve done when the situation starts to unravel. Nobody expects a full-term to pass without any mistakes being made. We are a forgiving people, but enough of the lies.

2. Moral Standing. Character matters, and we can afford to count it in the considerations. Webster brought a word to our language specifically for this sentence. UNIMPEACHABLE. We require that word to apply to your word, your honor, and your character. If you have a habit of deferring to either your genitals or your personal pocketbook when its time to make a decision that will affect a large group of people, you’re not right for the job.

3. Intellect. I’m not sold on education as the highest measure of intellect, particularly since there has been at least one idiot in every class I’ve ever taken, and that idiot usually got a decent grade, BUT … if you don’t have a working knowledge of how the world works, AND who works it, you’re not right for the job.

4. Compassion. The candidate is running for controlling interest behind the wheel of a nation of PEOPLE. If you don’t care about people, even the least of them, you’re not right for the job.

5. Balance. In addition to those people, we are a nation of Corporations. Those entities are the method we’ve chosen to provide for ourselves. We expect you to create an EXCELLENT climate for them to succeed. But never forget WHY the corporation must succeed, it is the means to an end, namely provision for “we the people.” ALL OF US. We are both a spritual and religious nation. But we serve a wide variety of higher powers, and for the most part, we have good hearts. We need you to keep it safe for ALL of us, whether we’ve chosen to believe in Jesus, Allah, Yahweh, Mother Earth, the Almighty Dollar, the Virgin Mary, Buddha, Hare Crishna, Lucifer, all or none of the above. Our nation is not just our religion, or our military, our companies, our disagreements, or our money. Our nation is all of these things. If you can’t hear the words that are coming out of my mouth because you don’t agree with me, you’re not right for the job.

6. Competence. We’ve lost thousands of citizens of late, due to simple-ass incompetence. We’ll work with you, we’ll support you, we’ll fund you, we’ll cheer for you, we’ll pray for you, we’ll defend you, we’ll fight for you, we’ll die for you, we’ll kill for you. Make us regret it, and we’ll turn on you. If you’re not capable of actually doing the work that’s required to earn that sort of love, you’re not right for the job.

7. COURAGE. We’re tired of people whose courage only applies to the opinion they already had. We’re looking for someone who has not only the courage of his or her OWN convictions, we’re interested in a leader who has the courage of OUR convictions. Because polls be damned, there ARE things we believe in. And if you’re not courageous enough to meet us to talk, and then act on what we believe, you’re not right for the job.

Being the President IS NOT about that moment standing in one of America's great arenas with the red, white, and blue confetti falling from the rafters. It's about being the people's gladiator in the arenas of policy, and international diplomacy, and during national disasters, and moments of sorrow.

This isn’t a “pick three” list. We need ALL of these things, and a few more. As this campaign season kicks off, WATCH these candidates. BELIEVE what you see. As the ineffably wise De La Soul have told us, “Stakes is high.”

Peace,
--Stew.

Extra Credit: What would you add to the list?