So here we go again.
This is my least favorite time of year.
The dreaded Christmas.
I know, I know … I should really be a fan, but I’m not. There are just a few reasons.
1. Christmas lasts entirely too long. My GROCERY store has been playing carols since shortly before Halloween.
2. Christmas brings out the “perky” in people. I DESPISE perky. Not sure why.
3. Christmas is about forced gift-giving. My friends will confirm—I’m not cheap, by any stretch of the imagination. But I buy gifts, because I see something that I think will make someone happy, or because I see something that I want them to have. It has never occurred to me that I should buy a gift because it’s a particular day. (And yes, this counts for birthdays, too)
4. I actually like Ebenezer, at least … until he sells out at the end.
5. There are never any NEW Christmas carols. And I’m REALLY sick of the old ones.
(Although I give "We Three Kings" a pass, because at LEAST its written in a minor key. Its OBVIOUSLY a spooky halloween song that somebody put happy lyrics to. I always find it funny when they put it in the middle of Joy to the World, and some jovial crap like "Angels We Have Heard On High. It always sticks out like a hooker at high mass.)
6. Hate Santa Claus, he only shows up when the parent have money. When they’re broke, he’s broke. Think the reindeer would be tasty in venison stew, and I REALLY wish Frosty would come play in July, when we’re really having fun. Since he doesn’t, I assume he doesn’t really love us.
Thanksgiving, I love. Food, family, fun, football. One day long—two or three if you count the cook day(s), and a day to either unwind, or clean up.
I dig New Year’s. New beginnings, new starts, blahblahblah. But Christmas? Pre-ghost Ebenezer said it best. “Bah, Humbug.”
Please don’t write me with suggestions on how to make this season better, or why I shouldn’t be a Scrooge. I am what I am, lol. Don’t bother telling me I shouldn’t be this way, you’re FAR too late to the party to have an opinion on that part of me.
Merry F-ing Christmas.
--Stew.
This is my least favorite time of year.
The dreaded Christmas.
I know, I know … I should really be a fan, but I’m not. There are just a few reasons.
1. Christmas lasts entirely too long. My GROCERY store has been playing carols since shortly before Halloween.
2. Christmas brings out the “perky” in people. I DESPISE perky. Not sure why.
3. Christmas is about forced gift-giving. My friends will confirm—I’m not cheap, by any stretch of the imagination. But I buy gifts, because I see something that I think will make someone happy, or because I see something that I want them to have. It has never occurred to me that I should buy a gift because it’s a particular day. (And yes, this counts for birthdays, too)
4. I actually like Ebenezer, at least … until he sells out at the end.
5. There are never any NEW Christmas carols. And I’m REALLY sick of the old ones.
(Although I give "We Three Kings" a pass, because at LEAST its written in a minor key. Its OBVIOUSLY a spooky halloween song that somebody put happy lyrics to. I always find it funny when they put it in the middle of Joy to the World, and some jovial crap like "Angels We Have Heard On High. It always sticks out like a hooker at high mass.)
6. Hate Santa Claus, he only shows up when the parent have money. When they’re broke, he’s broke. Think the reindeer would be tasty in venison stew, and I REALLY wish Frosty would come play in July, when we’re really having fun. Since he doesn’t, I assume he doesn’t really love us.
Thanksgiving, I love. Food, family, fun, football. One day long—two or three if you count the cook day(s), and a day to either unwind, or clean up.
I dig New Year’s. New beginnings, new starts, blahblahblah. But Christmas? Pre-ghost Ebenezer said it best. “Bah, Humbug.”
Please don’t write me with suggestions on how to make this season better, or why I shouldn’t be a Scrooge. I am what I am, lol. Don’t bother telling me I shouldn’t be this way, you’re FAR too late to the party to have an opinion on that part of me.
Merry F-ing Christmas.
--Stew.
(24 Nov 06)
No comments:
Post a Comment